Ramtha, I answer you

Whilst following along, with some of the Ramtha teachings, their connection, between quantum physics and string theory, and how there is now, a dawning scientific evidence, that indeed, thought does create reality...
Ramtha, began to explain, about addictions, and why, if that is so, do people create such terrible realities.
Ramtha, seems to figure, that one can become addicted to emotions, just the same as any drug.
And that the firing of these synapsis, through the neuropathways of the brain, to stimulate the emotions, tend to repeat themselves, quickly forgetting the information that lay there before, in favor of the new pathways.

In fact, eventually, following a trail along, certain repetitive occurances, the synapsis, of the old path, begin to deteriorate, and fade.
In this manner, it is much like a drug addiction.
The brain begins to believe that it cannot function properly unless the drug is in your system.
The old pathways, shut down, and deteriorate, and the neuropathways, currently in use, push the body, for more and more sources of stimulation, leading the body to a symptomatic withdrawl, when these sources are not being pushed through it.
This same philosophy, in effect, will work on your various other bodies. Such as the emotional, mental, and spiritual bodies, as well.
This drive, is somewhat mechanical, as our brain filters our experiences (or substances) that we intake, striving, and pushing, the being, into creating ever more sources to fuel that addictive cycle.

This was my understanding anyways, of the gist of Ramtha's explanation
At the end of this explanation, the being looked very pointedly out to the audience, and asked...
So what emotions are you addicted to?

This question struck me quite deeply, being as to how, I have had a phenomenal interest, in the study and experience of addictions throughout several of my lifetimes upon this planet.
I had been relieved to find myself on the outside of this experience in this particular one, until Ramtha spoke that question.

I am addicted to my emotions, as equally, if not more so, then many on this planet.

I have discovered, I am addicted to hurt. to suffering. and to failure. and to being alone, and misunderstood. lost in a world, where I am not accepted as I am.
In the last blog, I described, how I became used to these emotions, being a part of day to day life, so used to it in fact, that I did not even question the existence of them.
I think, perhaps, at more then one point, these emotions were all I had left to tell me I was still alive.

Unfortunately, somewhere along the way, I have taught my brain, to create a reality, in which I will be rich, and prosperous in recieving heavy doses, of the life experiences conducive to feeling that way.

So you see folks, I don't really pass the buck here, I take full responsibility, for the lifetime I have created, I just want you to all leave me the fuck alone, and let me live it.

However, I now begin the process of changing the emotional addictions I have trapped myself to, so you no longer have the ability, to intrude and hurt the way you do.

Thank you so much to all of you, who have helped me create my experiences. This was very noble of you. It is not always easy, to assist a loved one to self destruct.
And I forgive those of you, who's neuropathways, have become so ingrained in helping me experience the richness of that, that you can no longer stop just because I request you too.
You need not fear, eventually, I shall be so far over that, that I won't even need you anymore, and you will find yourself another to do these things to.